Will they return!?

Dad, do you think they will return..!?

I looked at him! He was too small. What he was not aware of that they will never return. He was optimistic. He was sure of their return. I could not tell him the truth. The innocent look in his eyes kills me. I was so sad. How to tell him they all died? How to tell him they are no longer here? How to explain to him the meaning of death and how to justify their death? They all have died in front of his eyes. They died because they wanted life. Died and their only fault was that they wanted to live like other human beings. How to explain it? And even if I can explain, will he understand ..!?

I picked him up and attached him to my chest. I tried to make him feel love and safe. I cried and my eyes burst into tears. Few moments and he start crying also. I tried to hold my tears and to collect myself and asked him to promise me not to cry again. Then he smiled and promised me.

We have heard foot sprints again. I think that they came to kill us this time. There must be so many of them this time. I still can’t believe that there are people like this. If you looked at their eyes you will realize that they were born just to kill. It is their favorite sport. There is no much time remaining. I don’t care for my life any more now. But, this child must survive. Those children are the only hope reaming for us. One day they will free us from this evil. One day men like “Salah El Din” will come out of them. One day we will be free again.

We run as fast as we can pass the ruins of my home. We were here few hours ago. And, now it is just ashes. I start removing the dead bodies from my way. This is the body of my neighbor and this is the remains of my brother. This is my father’s arm. I don’t care much of anything anymore. We were here playing together few hours ago and now!!! All what I care for now is to rescue this child. He was beside me all the time watching me as I removed the bodies. It was strange that he seemed not to be afraid any more. I think that he used to this type of scenes.

Finally I reached to the street after an extreme effort. They were everywhere and there was no more suitable place to hide any more. Suddenly an enemy tank appeared in the far horizon. It came towards us so fast. I noticed a tree trunk that fits to hide in beside the road. Quickly I carried the boy and hide inside this trunk. Thanks God, the tank passed without noticing us. I decided to hide here till night comes. I didn’t know that it will be a very different and terrible night!!

At past we used to make fun of our children because they are always afraid of darkness. But now and after a terrible night like this, I excuse them. Imagine with me, you are sleeping in the biggest graveyard can be imagined. Dead bodies everywhere, screaming, bullets sound, tanks, the smell of flesh and blood. Simply it is the worst nightmare that you can ever dream with. You can imagine how the child looks like now. I took him and started running again. I can’t stay here anymore or I will be mad. But I was so confident in our God mercy and that he will save us somehow.

While we were walking I saw a dazzling light approaching from afar. This time was approaching very quickly. It seemed to be a car this time. But where can I hide again? I do not see anything in this dark night. I held the boy and ran fast, the car is getting closer. They should see us now. They will kill us no doubt. I fell down as we ran and I kept holding the child. I think that this is the end, we will die here. I Said to the child”I’m so sorry my angel; I did all what I can. Forgive me my baby. And don’t forget that you promised me not to cry whatever happened”.

Often we lose hope. Often we think that it is the end. And we discover later that it was just the beginning. This night was also the beginning. I heard a familiar voice telling me "give me the child and get into the car with us". He was my old neighbor. I was so happy, I thought that he was dead also. We got into the car with them as fast as we could and I didn’t stop looking to him and smiling. I can’t believe. I thought that it is the end. I asked him where we will go. The enemy's soldiers are everywhere. He said that we will drive towards borders, we all will emigrate. I asked him how we will leave our land so easily, we grew up here, lived on this land and spent our wonderful days here. He held my hands and his tears dropped from his eyes and said “we will return one day”. He was very sad, me also. But I believed one day we will return.

We reached our destination at sunrise. It was a very different sunrise this time. It was full of hope and joy. The boy was looking from the car window. Looking for the future, for the unknown. It was a very sad look. I will never forget his eyes. It was as if he was asking “will we return one day?” I read this in his eyes. I held his hands and said “yes, one day we will return, one day we will come back to free our land, one day we will return to fight. One day the birds will sing again and the rivers will be full of water. One day we will return…”

Dear reader do you really thing that they will come back one day!!?

Taha